So over last week, I talked a lot about finding yourself, growing up, deciding where you want to be, and making a difference… And we mentioned that we needed to find ourselves- discover where we ARE- before we can start mapping out the directions to where we want to be.
So this week, I want to help you guys figure out where you are. Hopefully last week, you found yourself on the Enneagram Easy Summary and found a description that really spoke to you. After that, you should have looked even deeper at THIS PAGE to find out a little more about that type. Make sure that the description sounds a LOT like you. It won’t be perfect- but there should be a lot of similarities between those descriptions and how you feel and act. Remember, this is not to hold you down or lock you in to anything… this is just about being self aware- knowing what makes you tick.
So now you have a basic kind of core motivation that you feel (success, relationship, perfection, happiness, etc..) and that the same thing that makes you so awesome in some aspects can also come out sideways and make you less than awesome. So just come to accept your limitations and embrace your weaknesses and your strengths… it’s all you. But many of you are trying so hard to fit in somewhere that you haven’t looked really hard at where you actually fit. We all try so hard to be our IMAGE instead of who we ARE. And I can tell you right now, that NEVER works. You’re always working against who you really are. Take some time and look inside. Figure out who you are… because if you don’t- and you hide who you really are for your whole life… it’s like you never existed- you don’t even count. At best, you’ll just be a poor imitation of someone else for the rest of your life. And that is a miserable experience to have to live. And at the same time, nobody gets the pleasure of knowing you.
We’ve all heard the little saying “Sticks and stones may break your bones but words can never hurt you.” That’s Complete and Utter Bull Poo. Words can destroy people… Bruises heal fast- broken bones get a cast and you’re fine in a month or two… But your emotions? Your heart? No way to bandage, cast, or assist it’s healing. You have to just wait- WITHOUT ANY MORE NEW DAMAGE- for it to heal. Problem is, since you can’t bandange or cast it- you can’t really protect it from other people’s little verbal stones and darts they throw. You have to have a shield. And that shield is simply the truth. The truth of who you are, EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE. No pretending you don’t have faults or being embarassed about your strengths… it’s accepting it all- just as you are. And realize that it’s all connected.
We started looking at the truth of who you are with the personality test things and finding your place in the enneagramm. Some people can’t find a good fit in there- so here’s the next step:
Tell Me who you are. I want you to write down 50 things about you that are good. Yep- Fifty. And they all have to be different. Put your name at the top of the paper and give me 50 things that are good about you. We’ll call this the “Big 50.” This is not what you’re good at doing- you are not what you do… you are simply what you are. Some of your list will be things you are good at doing (football, playing guitar, etc..) but think deeper- about the things that are good about you because it’s the kind of person you are (Examples: I’m Generous. I’m a good listener. I’m honest to people. I’m a good friend.)
I want this on it’s own sheet of paper.
This Week’s “Do-it’s”:
- Big 50
You said you enjoyed my last comment, and this is the kind of stuff that is the most interesting to me (regarding the mind, emotions, thought processes, and the like; I consider myself an artist but to me I only take pride in my work if it speaks this kind of message), so I figured I might as well post another comment since this piqued my interest.
I know you probably didn’t mean to exclude this, but I figured it would be worth pointing out to other people who might read this; people have personality types, yes, that are set by genes and whatnot. But by saying “you are simply what you are” doesn’t mean that one can’t improve upon oneself. There are many people out there who don’t try to improve themselves just because they think they are incapable of it. Which is not the case; I know that because I’ve been through a lot for a kid my age (I think I’ve earned the right to say that). Unfortunately there are just lots of people out there who just think it’s not plausible to improve themselves, and it’s these kinds of people (they are the majority, sadly) who lose their moral compass and any hope of success as well.
Furthermore, despite having a distinct personality type, you’re not, should not be, and should not try to be *absolutely* different from everyone else. Sure, we are all different, but we can and should be the same in some ways. It is of my personal opinion that if we are to follow different paths, they must all be forks in the same road. The road we need to be on is one that leads us to being better, more honorable people, regardless of our personality types. While technology has only progressed, society these days seems to have *de*gressed, with people being less respectful of each other, more selfish, more cynical, etc. That’s a road heading backwards. People all the time think they’re intellectuals because they’re ruthless and only think in those selfish, cynical ways, and manage to snake their way to wealth and power. I can tell you that they are not intellectual, nor truly wealthy or powerful in the end.
But yeah, I’ve been ranting again. Sorry, haha